One whole year

February 16th marked my one full year as a new director of development at the University Catholic Center.    I cannot believe it's already a year and at the same time, I can't believe it's only been a year.  I have learned so much about myself, my spirituality, and my career in this year.

I left a job that was both emotionally and physically draining.  I left b/c I could go no further in my organization, it was not a good working situation, and it was time.  When you know that you are hurting your project instead of helping, it's time to go.  When you don't believe in the direction of where the agency is going, you gotta go.  When you cry at work b/c of stupidity, you gotta go.

Though I may question it from time to time, I made a good choice.  I have learned and experienced so much and I know it will continue.  And guess what, it turns out I'm pretty good at this stuff.

I don't know why I thought to write this week, but I just felt it in me.  I had one of the most challenging weeks at my job to date.  I wish I could go into more detail, but let's just leave it at that.  I was tested in all ways and thought for sure that I wouldn't make it to the time I had committed to a fellow co-worker.  When I have these days, the question I am always asked is: When is the bad going to start outweighing the good? I always tell them that no matter how much I complain about this particular problem, I know deep in my heart of hearts that this is where I am called to be.  How do I know this?  God.

Though my spirituality has been tested to the greatest degree at my current job, it has also grown in a much deeper way.  At the beginning of my job I was struggling.  I was struggling with working in a church that had only been my place of worship.  I struggled with understanding what my job entailed.  I struggled with starting over.  I struggled balancing working for the church and worshipping weekly.  Every single step of the way, I knew I was being taken care of.  I remember vividly sitting in Eucharistic Adoration with students and just pleading with God, "Help me.  I can't do this without you.  Please, God, help me."  And He did and continues to do so.

Monday was a day that bounced b/t being amazingly great and dramatically bad.  God sent me an honor from the Diocese.  Tuesday was a long day after a long night and He sent me an ally that I didn't ask for.  Wednesday was confronting injustice and I was met with a good friend in the parking lot and a great workout.  Today, God sent me flowers through an angel.  That was just this week!

If I had to sum up the past year it would be that change is hard, but not impossible.  I would say that there are always learning experiences and ways to grow.  I would also say that we never walk alone and prayer is a powerful thing.

I am grateful and blessed for this experience.  God will tell me when it's time to go, so for now I keep on moving forward and doing my small part to build up the kingdom and ensure that Catholic students at the University of Texas have a spiritual home.

Coach Mack Brown and me! A dream come true.  

Would not have happened without working at the UCC.  

Three time's a charm

I have been told by 3 different people in the past two weeks that I should start a blog.  Little did they know that I already had one b/c of a school assignment, but never did anything with it.  I believe that the Holy Spirit works in threes.  When the third sign comes, it's time to pay attention.

I am living a really busy life right now.  Some would argue that I've always been busy, but I think this is the busiest I've ever been with a lot of responsibilities.  I may have been busy before b/c of social commitments, but never have I been busy to the point where I have to look at free time as a reward for getting all that I have to do done.  I do not like living that way.

I am about to complete my first year in my job, I'm a thesis away from my Master's in organizational leadership and communication, and I'm a daughter, Tia, friend, sister, parish council member, volunteer, etc...  Free time is hard to find, but I believe that what I am doing is for the greater good and so I push through.

The greater good.  I use that phrase a lot.  I approach my job, my life, and my responsibilities that way.  I blame being the oldest and always thinking of the future.  I am getting my degree b/c I'm going to need it to be competitive in my next job.  I'm taking the road less traveled in my job b/c I want the work that I do to make a greater impact on the future than immediate temporary fixes.  I'm a great daughter, Tia, friend, etc. b/c I think that these people, my faith, all that I do will be there for me when I need them most.  They are already there for me.

The greater good.  I think a lot of the problems we're seeing in our country today is b/c we have failed to think about the greater good and have been too impatient to see how planning for the future will benefit so many people in the future.  We plug holes instead of building a strong foundation.  If our foundation isn't strong, then how we can expect anything but failure?  Then you're stuck with working backwards instead of being able to move forward.

I have a pretty intense job and I look forward to the day when I'm not trying to write a thesis in the middle of it all.  I love what I do and I love what the organization does, but being a newbie in the organization you have to fight against comments like "Well this is how it's always been done."  I hate that response.  Yup, I used the word hate.  Let's be honest, it's a cop out and it puts a stop to any kind of new ideas or thinking outside the box.

But, I also have to remember that I'm a grown up now and I am able to run my office the way that I best see fit.  As long as my intentions are good and put the organization's best interests ahead of everything then I can proceed with a clear conscience......in theory.  I'm still figuring that balance out, but here's hoping it can be done.  I was hired for a reason and I have to put my talents to good use for the greater good.

I think this blog thing is going to be a good outlet in the midst of craziness, in the midst of confusing times, in the midst of wanting to give up.  It will be for the greater good of my sanity.